’s Road to NoVA, part 3: The Widening Gyre

3.1 Same As It Ever Was

So it’s been a couple of weeks, and due to my unquenchable lust for clicks, here we are again. I’ve spend most of those weeks on Warhams. Unfortunately, because I’ve got brain worms, almost none of that was on actual NoVA prep – instead I’ve been worrying about a couple of 40k websites and, quelle surprise, losing a bunch of games.

That said, and this actually is a surprise, I won a game of 40k. A proper heads-up, 1v1, Matched Play win. My first this calendar year, and possibly in all of 8th edition.

Probably it still doesn’t count though, on account of I was playing a borrowed Guard list, against my own Dark Angels. For once my army being smelly toxic waste actually paid off for me, the savvy investor. Sadly and unfairly, I had to give the Cadians back after the game, so after a brief escape attempt I was returned to Warhammer Jail.

3.2 Current Life Status: I Have Fucked Up So Very Much

Right, the actual NoVA update. I glued my hands to the desk or my face a bunch of times, and also got plastic stuck together:

Well, it’s all built, at least. Straight up zero progress on painting, though.

Most of the models are straight builds, but there’s a couple of light kitbashes that barely qualify as conversions – power fists and swords on the Intercessor sergeants, and I used a non-robed Primaris torso and legs on the Apothecary because homeboy was looking a little too extra. I also accidentally broke one of the cables on an Inceptor’s gun, but I don’t think that counts as converting, which frankly is messed up.

The one model that definitely needed help was the Darkshroud, so here is me actually trying instead of just zoning out and doing things until I run out of room to slap bits on. Things I hated about this model:

  • The gunner with no space for legs in his little pulpit.
  • The DJ pit in the back, where Brother Eric B tears up the 1s and 2s to…aim a statue at people and make himself harder to get shot? I don’t get it either.
  • The kit is from that particular era of GW kits where every part has 5-8 sprue connections and no space to get clippers in there, plus the statue is made of probably 10 parts, including the extremely tiny sword.

I can’t do anything about the third point, but I gave it the old college try to sort out the first two.

Done, at least in the sense that I’m not working on it anymore, if not in the sense that it’s a finished display-ready model.

It still kind of sucks, but there’s only so much you can polish a turd, you know?

I also added a model for Azrael’s little helmet friend (bottom left, in the first image). He doesn’t do anything in-game, but he’s technically supposed to be there, and I didn’t want to get called out for not having him.He’s carrying a spare sword (due to reasons?) and has just chucked the Lion Helm on the ground, so I assume he kicks it around the battlefield like a soccer ball and runs after it when he moves. It’s probably heavy and he is very small, ok? Don’t helmet-shame.

3.3 Letting the Days Go By

Clearly I’m a little behind on things, a feeling that has only intensified after TheChirurgeon’s 130 hour countdown put the fear of God into me. I’m not good at math, but I know that he has more hobby time than I do, and uses it better, so that’s probably not a great sign.

As far as painting this stuff, I’d been planning on using the Dark Angels Green Contast [sic] paint to speed things up, but I made that classic mistake we all know and love. You know what it is, that thing all Goons know how to do, that’s right: I went outside instead of madly F5-ing the pre-order page. Everything sold out instantly, which is fine. Everything is fine, nothing is fucked, and I’m sure my well-known tendency to be organized and finish projects will see me through. Clearly.

I guess I need to start putting in work here, dang.